Growing up, I always felt uncomfortable with taking up space. I preferred to keep to myself and not be bothered. Even when I had things to share, I held back in fear of looking dumb. If I said nothing at all, I wouldn’t have to deal with the attention on me.
It’s so uncomfortable living like that. Not being heard or seen can feel very isolating. In this post I will share tips that I follow to help with my fear of taking up space. My confidence has definitely grown but it’s still an ongoing journey of overcoming the discomfort.
You are allowed to take up space.
If something comes to mind, share it.
Speak up. Share your opinion.
If you struggle to take up space, you probably are holding back a lot in conversations. You’re usually the listener, the one asking more questions just to keep the attention away from you. Become comfortable with being the center of attention! Don’t overthink it, don’t put yourself down. Remind yourself you have every right to share your story just as much as anyone else. Even when your mind tells you, “it’s not interesting enough”, “it’s not relevant”, “it’s not important” , ignore that hating ass voice and say it anyway. Share more than you normally would. We get so used to giving short, half-ass answers that it becomes automatic. Watch how people are receptive to it and acknowledge it.
Be “self-absorbed”. Bring up the topic about yourself.
For the longest time (even now at times) I felt like, if they cared they would ask. But it’s not always that personal, people will innocently forget to ask about things or never think to ask (just like we all do). So speak up and talk about yourself! Obviously be mindful and don’t take over the conversation the entire time. Let others take up space as well. And if friends have shown lack of interest when you share, then maybe reconsider those friendships. But if there’s no reason to think they don’t care, then share. Your closest friends and family should want to hear more about you and your life. It does not make you self centered.
What you have to share matters. You bring something different than anyone else.
Take up space on social media. Start that business, post that tiktok, share your experience, share your gifts. Trust me there are plenty of people that are not as talented or have a pointless story but they share anyway! You never know what impact you can have on other people if you never share. You never know who might resonate with you. That’s why I continue to post on my blog and share my thoughts. Eventually my blog will reach the people who resonate and benefit from my content.
Celebrate yourself.
Further take up space and show yourself off on social media. Especialllyyy if you’ve acheived or created something you’re proud of. You are worthy of being celebrated. We have to celebrate ourselves just as much as we would for a friend. I know we lowkey wish someone else will make the effort to celebrate, but you should be your own #1 supporter. To celebrate just make those plans, announce it, post yourself.
F*ck being humble. Take up space.
Contribute to conversations. Celebrate your acheivements. Show yourself off on social media. Advertise your small business. Be your own #1 supporter. These are some ways you can take up space in life. It’s nervewracking and uncomfortable to really put yourself out there, but at some point you just gotta do it girl.
Thank you for being here and I wish you all the best. Have a great day/night! <3